Grief Games: Can Playing About Loss Help?
- Reflection level
- Result
- Time played
- 2 hours
- You entered
- Grief intensity (1-10)
- 5
- You entered
Yes, playing a game about loss can help some people process grief, by offering a safe, structured space to explore difficult emotions and practice coping. These games don’t replace therapy or real-life support, but they can provide comfort, validation, and a new perspective on an experience that often feels isolating. This article explains how grief-themed games work, what to consider when choosing one, and answers common questions about their potential benefits and limits.
Formula
The calculator above is a conceptual tool, not a clinical measure. It estimates an “emotional processing score” based on time spent with a grief game and self-rated grief intensity. The formula is: Emotional Processing Score = (Time played in hours × 10) + (Grief intensity × 2). Variables are: t = time played (hours), g = self-rated grief intensity (1–10). The result is a rough indicator of how much reflective engagement you might be getting, not a diagnostic or therapeutic metric.
Worked Example
Using the default values: t = 2 hours, g = 5. Score = (2 × 10) + (5 × 2) = 20 + 10 = 30. Reflection level = g / t = 5 / 2 = 2.5. So after two hours of play with moderate grief intensity, the estimated processing score is 30, and the reflection level is 2.5 (on a scale where higher means more reflection per hour).
How Grief-Themed Games Work
Grief-themed games—such as Spiritfarer, That Dragon, Cancer, Gris, or Before Your Eyes—use interactive storytelling to place players in situations involving loss, mourning, and remembrance. Unlike passive media, games require active participation: you make choices, solve puzzles, and move characters through a narrative. This engagement can create a sense of agency and emotional investment that feels different from watching a film or reading a book.
Key mechanisms include:
- Metaphor and symbolism: Games often represent grief as a physical world (e.g., a dark landscape, a broken bridge) that the player gradually restores, mirroring the internal process of healing.
- Safe distance: The player controls a character, not themselves, which can make it easier to approach painful feelings without being overwhelmed.
- Pacing: Players can pause, stop, or replay moments, giving them control over how much emotional weight they take on at once.
- Community and sharing: Many players discuss their experiences online, which can reduce isolation.
Potential Benefits for Grieving Players
Research on digital games and mental health is still emerging, but several plausible benefits have been noted by therapists and players:
- Normalization: Seeing a character grieve can validate that your own feelings are normal and shared.
- Emotional release: Games can provide a safe outlet for sadness, anger, or confusion.
- Perspective shift: Interactive narratives can help you think about loss in new ways, such as focusing on gratitude or legacy.
- Routine and focus: For some, the structured nature of a game offers a temporary distraction that prevents rumination.
It’s important to note that these benefits are anecdotal and not a substitute for professional grief counseling. A game cannot process grief for you; it can only create conditions that might support your own processing.
How to Choose a Grief Game
Not all grief games are the same. Some are explicit and literal; others are abstract. Consider the following:
- Your current state: If you are in acute grief, a game that is relentlessly sad might be overwhelming. A gentler, more hopeful game might be better.
- Gameplay style: Do you prefer puzzle-solving, exploration, or narrative-driven choices? Pick a game that matches your usual preferences.
- Length and commitment: Some games take 10+ hours; others can be completed in 2–3 hours. Shorter games may be easier to finish if your energy is low.
- Content warnings: Look up trigger warnings (e.g., depictions of terminal illness, death of a child) before starting.
Popular examples include Spiritfarer (a management game about ferrying spirits to the afterlife), Gris (a platformer about loss and recovery), and Before Your Eyes (a narrative game controlled by blinking). All are widely praised for their sensitive handling of grief.
Common Problems and Misconceptions
A common misconception is that playing a grief game will “fix� your grief or make it worse. In reality, games are neither a cure nor a guaranteed trigger. They are tools that can be used well or poorly. Another misconception is that only people currently grieving should play them; many players use them to build empathy for others who are grieving.
Potential problems include:
- Emotional overwhelm: If you are not in a stable place, the content may intensify distress. It’s okay to stop and take breaks.
- Expecting too much: A game cannot replace human connection, therapy, or time. It can only be one part of a broader coping strategy.
- Avoidance: Some players might use games to avoid real-life emotions rather than process them. If you notice that you are playing to escape rather than engage, consider stepping back.
Comparisons to Other Media
How do games compare to films, books, or music about grief? The key difference is interactivity. A book or film presents a story; a game asks you to participate. This can make the emotional experience more visceral and personal. For example, in Spiritfarer, you physically perform the act of hugging a character before they depart, which can feel more powerful than watching a character hug someone. However, games also require more effort and attention, which can be a barrier if you are exhausted or struggling to concentrate.
Costs and Accessibility
Grief-themed games range from free to around $30–40, depending on the platform and sales. Many are available on PC, consoles, and mobile devices. Some, like Gris, are relatively short and can be completed in a few sittings. Others, like Spiritfarer, are longer and more involved. You don’t need a high-end computer to play most of these; many are optimized for low-end hardware. If cost is a concern, look for free demos, sales, or subscription services that include games.
Safety and When to Seek Help
Playing a grief game is generally safe for most adults and older teens. However, it is not a therapeutic intervention. If you are experiencing severe depression, suicidal thoughts, or prolonged inability to function, please seek professional help. A game can be a complement to therapy, but it should never be a replacement. If you are unsure whether a game is appropriate for you, consider discussing it with a counselor or trusted friend.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can a game about loss make my grief worse?
For most people, it won’t, but it can intensify emotions temporarily. If you are in a fragile state, start with a gentler game and take breaks. If you feel consistently worse after playing, stop and talk to someone you trust.
Are grief games only for people who have lost someone?
No. Many players use them to build empathy, understand a friend’s experience, or explore themes of mortality. They can be meaningful for anyone, regardless of recent loss.
How long should I play a grief game?
There is no set rule. Some people play for 30 minutes, others for hours. Listen to your emotions. If you feel overwhelmed, stop. If you feel engaged and safe, continue at your own pace.
Are these games suitable for children?
Some are, but it depends on the game and the child’s maturity. Games like Spiritfarer are rated for teens, while others may be more intense. Parents should preview content or read reviews before allowing younger children to play.
Can playing a grief game replace therapy?
No. Games can support emotional processing, but they cannot provide the individualized guidance, coping strategies, and safety that a licensed therapist offers. If you are in therapy, you might discuss the game with your therapist to integrate it into your work.
Related
Formula used
in t | Time played | hours | 2 | 0 in g | Grief intensity (1-10) | - | 5 | 1 out s | Emotional processing score | - | (t * 10) + (g * 2) | 0 out r | Reflection level | - | g / t | 2
Each line is one input (in, sel, list) or one result (out: label, unit, formula, decimals). How the calculators work
Method: the standard formula for this calculation, rounded as each result states. See how the calculators work or report an error.